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Be Authentic, Connect With Your Audience: Presentation Lessons From Gary Vaynerchuk

From watching Gizmodo’s live blogging coverage from today’s event at Apple’s HQs, it seems that things went a little sideways.  No, there were no technical glitches, or streakers across the stage, but somehow, the usually invincible presenter Steve Jobs struck a sour note with many of the folks in the room.

From the get-go, things weren’t exactly as they could have been.  From what I undertand, Apple rolled the YouTube video The Antennae song as a warm up, just before the press conference began.

If you haven’t seen it, it is yet another video of an average looking white guy bustin’ some hip hop skills, and basically delivering the message that this antennae issue is really no big deal, and if you don’t like the iPhone 4, don’t buy it. If you bought and you don’t like it, return it.

Playing Defense

As anyone who is worked with me can tell you, my broken record message is this: “First, serve the needs of the audience.”  Typically, when we see Steve take the stage, Apple’s needs and the audience’s needs are one and the same – everyone wants to get excited about the newest jewel in the Apple crown.  And when those two needs are in alignment, Jobs soars as a communicator.

This morning, the needs of the audience  – the press and consumers like me tuning into the live blog coverage – and the needs of the Apple executives were decidedly at odds.  The Audience/Press needed to know a) what was causing the problem and b) what Apple was doing to fix it.

Apple’s needs were to a) defend themselves and b) show how few people were actually experiencing this service issue.

Which way did Steve take it?  Unfortunately, he put the needs of Apple first.  The result?  He came off as defensive, and victim-like – why pick on us??  By the time he finally got around to proclaiming his love and concern for Apple customers, people were already pretty turned off.

The sad thing is that you would be hard pressed to find a CEO who cares more about his customers than Steve Jobs.

If Jobs had flipped the order of his comments, it would have made a big difference. Would it have been perfect? No.  But it would have established that the consumer comes first, and that ONE devoted Apple customer affected by crappy service is one too many.  By owning that, we the audience would have been far more open to hearing the logic behind the cause of the problems, and the relatively small impact it has had on the majority of users.

What can the rest of us learn?

For anyone in the media relations game, there is a very important lesson to be learned here.  Never make someone else “wrong.”  Steve Jobs made the press “wrong” for blowing the service issues out of proportion and for picking on Apple.

Whenever we make someone “wrong” we close down the lines of communication.  Does it mean we can’t feel hurt or upset or angry? No. In fact, we have to give ourselves room to feel all of those things. But we need to avoid acting from those places, especially when we go on record in front of an audience.

What he could have done was consider this: While it is true that it must feel like Apple is under siege at times, it is also true that most press believe that their job is to look at/uncover controversy and expose the truth.

If Jobs had been able to see this as less a personal attack, and more a professional obligation on the part of the press, he might have been less defensive. It might have freed him up to first address the fact that Apple cares DEEPLY about any problems their customers experience.  Then he could have gone into detail about the whys and the fixes.

Instead, it felt like, “It’s really not a big deal, but we’ll give you a free cover if that will make you happy.”

The beauty of learning this skill is that it extends into every human interaction we have.  Try it and you’ll see. The next time your spouse blows up at you for something you don’t agree with, try putting aside your needs for a moment, and focus completely on understanding his/her perspective, and meeting that need. Chances are, your spouse will be more willing to hear your side of the story.

You may even get lucky.

Having seen the roadshow “decks” that people continue to trot out to investors, it’s shocking anyone gets any money at all.

Take a gander and enjoy!

B

How To Prepare For Your IPO Roadshow

Right now, I’m seeing an awful lot of interest in coaching as it applies to the simple task of meetings – clearly communicating your points, and leveraging them as an opportunity to convey executive presence.

People are beginning to sense that He/She who holds our attention, respects our time, and our needs for information and interaction is he/she who gets promoted.

So in the unlikely event that we can only blame ourselves for crappy meetings, let’s “be the change we want to see in the world,” as Ghandi said, and take this challenge together.

Try these 5 tips to making meetings less hideous (Ghandi would do it):

1.  Be Present: There is no such thing as multitasking.** This is a heartbreaker for those of us who live on conference calls, but it is true: As John Medina the brilliant author of Brain Rules teaches us, “the attentional part of the brain is simply not capable of multi-tasking.” In other words, the part of the brain we use to pay attention to something is only able to focus on one thing, sequentially, at a time.

Given that I have ADD myself, this is probably the hardest tip for me.  If it’s helpful, here’s what I do to channel boredom:

• Turn off the computer (or at least put it to sleep).
• Take notes, and when someone is rambling, try and find a thread of logic that explains what path they’re rambling down and why they may be rambling that way.  Note the emotion or lack thereof.  Tune in as carefully as possible to both the content of the ramble and the emotion behind it. It’s truly fascinating, and gives you great insights for later if you need to clarify something he or she said.
• Doodle.  According to a study highlighted in this recent article in Time Magazine, it turns out that “doodlers actually remember more than nondoodlers when asked to retain tediously delivered information, like, say, during a boring meeting or a lecture.” Amen brother.  So feel free.  Just make sure it’s G-rated.   Just sayin’.

** There is an exception to this rule. Some companies have a meeting culture that requires that its employees be in meetings from 8am to 6pm, daily.  In these special circumstances, you have my blessing to multitask, as you really have no other choice if you want to have a life.  But just realize that the quality of your work will suffer. Small price to pay for getting home in time to tuck your kids into bed, right?

2.  WTF Are We Doing Here?

Recently, I interviewed Aliza Hutchison, Director, Strategic Communications at Cisco, because I hear wonderful things about Cisco’s approach to management, meetings and all things collaboration.

Aliza explained that at Cisco, they coach their executives and leaders to establish the kind of meeting they’re having from the outset.  “When you work and lead in a collaborative environment, you have to be very specific about how you want to engage with team members, otherwise a whole lot of time can be wasted in meetings.”

According to Aliza, at Cisco, there are three types – Inform, Engage and Exchange.

Inform meetings are all about the leader conveying information with limited interaction.  Sometimes, that’s just the kind of meeting you gotta have. Tell your audience what’s up, answer questions, and move on.

Engage meetings are those that require some level of inform + interaction with attendees.

Exchange meetings are for brainstorming.

By knowing exactly what kind of meeting you’re hosting or attending, you immediately establish just how much yappin’ is appropriate. This may seem simple, but it has powerful implications for how people’s precious time is utilized.

3. What’s My Role?

Too often we either overstep our roles in meetings by weighing in on things that aren’t appropriate, or we don’t step up enough to offer guidance, opinions or suggestions out of fear and uncertainty.

If you don’t know what your role is, or what is expected of you in a meeting, find out.  No one will fault you for clarifying your role. As a bonus, the person calling the meeting may realize that you don’t need to join after all. Score!

As Aliza said so very wisely during our conversation, “Know yourself. If your role is X and you start commenting about Y, stop yourself.  If you feel you have something really helpful to say, exchange once. And then let it be.”

Once you have established your goal, I strongly recommend asking yourself, “What does success look like for me in this conversation?” Then ask “What does this group need from me? What do they need to remember?”  Write down the few items you need to convey (keep it brief), and make sure you hit those points.

Sound basic? How many times have you left a conference call only to realize you forgot to ask something critical?

4. Conflict Happens.

All of us have been there. The nightmare meeting that becomes a shouting match, or a quietly contentious discussion that leaves everyone’s heart rate elevated.  Noisy or quiet, these kinds of exchanges can poison our work efforts for days and weeks.  After all, it’s no secret that stress impacts our ability to think creatively and perform well.  Regardless, conflict is a given in this lifetime, and we can only worry about what we can control – our own reactions.

So the next time you find yourself at odds with someone else, here’s a crazy tip:

Put your agenda/position aside for just a few moments, and try to understand the other person’s perspective completely.

By listening with empathy (not sympathy, empathy), and fully understanding someone else’s position and motivation, you are far more able to meet them, and offer solutions or compromises that meet their needs as well as yours.

As Stephen Covey says in his legendary book 7 Habits of Highly Successful People, “Sympathy is a form of agreement, a judgment. The essence of empathic listening is not that you agree with someone; it’s that you fully understand him, emotionally and intellectually.”

Mysteriously, when we fully listen and empathize using paraphrasing and clarifying techniques, it takes the sting out of criticisms, and softens us to creative ideas for compromise.

5. Enjoy  the Process.

As Aliza said during our conversation, “Ultimately, we have to enjoy the process of getting better at communicating – in meetings and beyond.  If someone doesn’t understand where I’m coming from, I ask myself, ‘how can I make this interesting or fun for them?’  By making our journey more about the process and not about simply getting what we want out of people, it becomes a lot more interesting.”

Sounds like great advice for life in general, doesn’t it?  But that’s another posting for another day.

Are you up to the dare?  Let me know how it goes!

In what may be the best anti-PowerPoint rant I’ve seen yet (THANK YOU @nchsmith for sending it my way), Jon Stewart takes a moment to examine the US Military’s strategy in Afghanistan via the PowerPoint slide presented to General McChrystal when he took over 10 months ago.

My favorite part of Stewart’s rant is when he runs through several iconic “inspirational speeches” (scenes from Patton, Star Wars, Braveheart) showing PowerPoint’s VITAL role in each.  It is hilarious and true, and gets to the heart of why I am so busy these days.  PowerPoint doesn’t move people to take action.  People do.  And while yes, some people are more convincing, compelling and magnetic than others, EVERYONE has the ability to hold an audience’s attention with the right tools and techniques.

For too long, PowerPoint has been the ultimate CYA device.  We figure, if we pour every piece of information we know into a slide, everyone is satisfied. The boss. The customer. The partner. The colleage. Right?  Maybe. But we’ve now also bored the audience to the point of catatonic stupor.

Thankfully, blessedly, there is a not-so-quiet movement toward understanding the real art of storytelling, and how our brains receive, process and recall information.  PowerPoint is extremely helpful if used properly (see article in iMedia), but ultimately, YOU are the main attraction. You and your ability to package information in a way that is memorable, repeatable, and dare I say… enjoyable.

In certain situations, PowerPoint is a wonderful tool to help create a mood, or make a visual impression. In other situations, you are far better served by conversation and interaction.  Unfortunately, people feel incredibly exposed when they go rogue, and fly without a deck.  As one person told me recently, “I may be boring, but I won’t get fired over a PowerPoint with text on it.  I might do some serious damage if I try and go too far afield with presenting.”

Well, fair enough.  Rome wasn’t built in a day.  But surely there are low risk situations where you can prep your superiors ahead of time that you’d like to try something more “brain friendly” for the audience.  Give it a shot.  Solicit people’s feedback.  I can almost guarantee you’ll enjoy the process, and worst case, you can always go back to your original Slide-ument style (Garr Reynold’s word, not mine).

But I predict that once you start down this path, you will begin to make a name for yourself as someone who “gets it” and has increasing “presence” within your organization.

Good luck, and let me know how it goes!

Social Media guru JD Lasica interviewed me a few months back at Girls In Tech’s Santa Cruz retreat about the topic of women and public speaking.  This is a subject near to my heart, and I’m on a mission to make sure women become more prominent players in the conference speaking circuit.  So please enjoy, and if you think it’s helpful, pass it along!

JD’s blog is always filled with interesting interviews (I’m obviously the exception. ), definitely worth bookmarking.

Cheers,

B

In the wake of this week’s F8 Conference, where Facebook gathered an ungodly number of frothing developers to talk about the fate of the social web, we got to see another example of Mark Zuckerberg on stage.

As Kara Swisher has so infamously joked, Mark is not exactly known for his on stage antics, so much as the news he delivers when he takes the stage.  And having watched him for a few years, I have come to some conclusions about him as a presenter.

It seems very clear that Mark is a very guarded person (understatement), and doesn’t actually enjoy cutting lose on camera, on stage, or really anywhere in the public eye.  And by “cutting lose” I don’t mean getting busted smoking a joint via someone’s cell phone camera, but showing us the real guy behind the stiff guardedness that characterizes his public interactions.

We seem to have a hard time reconciling what he looks like – jeans, hooded sweatshirt, his very winning smile, etc – and the very formal, clipped language he uses to speak to reporters, audiences, and even his own webcam (thank GOD for the outtakes at the end).

But what we saw at this year’s F8 was a far less awkward “Zuck,” as his friends call him.  He’s coming into his own, and is much more confident and even stately on stage.  But still, he gets heat for not being dazzling.  Why?

Well, I think at the core of all of this, we all have a Geek/Wunderkind Founder archetype in our minds that we love to imagine – self deprecating, nerdy, nice, funny, hyper in his own way.  This is not Mark Zuckerberg.  He may be young, but he is intense and deadly serious about the business he’s building.

(One of my favorite moments of him on camera … not in a good way … is when he was interviewing with 60 minutes, and the interviewer compared him to the legendary founders of Google.  His silence prompted to interviewer to say, “do you have a reaction to that?” And he deadpans, expressionless: “Well is that a question or a statement?”)

But here’s the thing: Mark Zuckerberg is not the Geek/Wunderkind Founder archetype we wish he were. Sorry.  The good news is that he’s getting more confident and competent as a speaker.  The bad news is, we’ll have to get our Lovable, Scruffy Nerd needs met elsewhere.

It really is the ultimate irony… Zuckerberg has become a gazillionaire by building a website where people go to express themselves in full.  Yet he may be one of the least expressive 25 year olds I’ve ever seen.

But no matter.  Judging by this video, there is an army of personalities inside Facebook that are compelling as hell on camera, and bring their glorious levity, excitement, and frankly unapologetic geek-thusaism to the business.

I was in Safeway tonight, and nearly wept with joy at the sight of Gordon Gekko’s smug face staring back at me from the cover of Vanity Fair.

Michael Douglas as Gekko is one of my favorite villains of all time, having delivered one of my favorite speeches of all time. Given that Wall Street 2 is due out this Fall, and the pre-promotion is already well under way, I think it’s high time we spend at least a few minutes giving the Devil his due (love that they chose Sympathy for the Devil as the theme for the trailer… it’s just deliciously wicked).

In the wake of Lehman Bros, Bernie Madoff, and a holy host of other “sure things” that have hit the decks over the past 18 months, the speech is even more satisfying in 2010 than it was in 1987.

(The image below will take you to a 45 second clip, but unfortunately, all traces of the speech in its full glory have been ripped from the bosom of YouTube by Fox).

Here are 4 reasons Gordon Gekko doesn’t need any coaching from me:

1. Tapping Emotion As I recall, the point of the Greed is Good speech was to stir up the shareholders of Teldar Paper to let Gekko’s company come in and do their thing… which usually entailed dismantling, pillaging and otherwise smacking a company around until every last cent was extracted (as Oliver Stone so unsubtly wanted us to understand).  So rather than approach these shareholder stiffs with facts, figures and hyper logical arguments, Gordon Gekko begins his speech by tapping an emotion we all love to feel : Outrage.  (See link to transcript below)
2. The Power of the Pause Gordon Gecko is not in the business of filling silences.  He knows the power… of a pregnant… pause.  Thanks to a bombastic, fantastic monologue written for him, he trusts the power of his words, and gives each word the space it needs to sail into the room and land gently onto the hearts and into minds of those in the audience. Not least of whom is the rapt Bud Fox (seems hilarious to think of Charlie Sheen cast as the wide eyed ingénue in retrospect, doesn’t it?).
3. Eye Contact Notice how he selects a single face for each phrase, each thought to land on.  It’s one of the secrets of great presenters… never make eye contact with “the audience,” make it with individuals. And don’t be in a hurry to switch to someone new.  Land long enough to feel them feelin’ you.
4. The Strong Finish Nothing wins over an audience like bold statements.  By the time Gekko gets to his infamous line, he’s got these people so deep in his pockets, they’ll follow him right off of the edge of sanity, but he doesn’t end on a whisper. He wraps it up with one of the most outrageous statements of all time – Greed is Good.

I think I love this speech even more since the unraveling of our financial system because it reminds us of the power of a great narrative, of charisma, and of passion.  It reminds us that while we should absolutely appreciate speeches for their art, delivery and the way they make us feel, we must remember to keep our brains turned on.  Lest we end up like Charlie Sheen with a wiretap taped to our hairy backs.

For those craving more, the transcript of the monologue can be found here.

Tomorrow I’ll be giving a “Power & Presence” workshop for the San Francisco Chapter of Girls In Tech.  I’ve been looking forward to this workshop for months, because the women I meet through Girls In Tech always dazzle me with their purpose and energy.  So of course, when I saw that today is International Women’s Day, I was reminded of what a privilege it is to work with these women, teaching them to be more powerful speakers!

But as I was putting together my presentation, something interesting happened.  I was searching out images to represent the word “Power,” and within a few seconds, I realized that I was seeing a visual representation of just how confused we are as a culture – a world culture – about the definition of “power.”

As you can imagine, my search pulled up mostly images of men, and when they featured women, it was in “masculine” settings:  A woman flexing her muscles.  A woman with a gun in her hand.  Or, worse yet, a woman pushing her stiletto into the back of a man who was laying face down, looking terrified.

Annoyed, but not surprised, I decided to search for some alternate key words.  This time I tried “joy,” then “collaboration” and then “enthusiasm.”  Bingo.  These images were of people (men and women) shining in their various ways.

This will be our work at tomorrow night’s event:  There is a fierce power inside each of us, and it looks a whole lot like collaboration, enthusiasm and joy.  When we tap that source each time we stand in front of an audience, magic happens.  Authenticity happens.  Generosity happens.

I truly believe that there is a new kind of power rising.  It doesn’t bully.  It doesn’t intimidate, and it doesn’t coerce.  This new power can transform a situation, and take us further than we ever dreamed possible.   And it doesn’t just belong to women.

On this, International Women’s Day, let’s celebrate those who have taught us what is possible when enthusiasm, joy and love replace doubt, pessimism, and fear.

Let us each be a light in this world today.  Shine on, you crazy diamonds.



Like all presentation coaches the world over, I am once again ruminating on Steve Jobs’ performance today as he unveiled the much anticipated iPad.  In fact, that sound you just heard was my jaw hitting the ground as I watched the iPad’s eReader demonstrated in Steve’s capable hands.  Full disclosure: I’m in a state of unbridled teenage lust over this product.  In other words, it may interfere with my ability to actually evaluate his delivery.  But here goes.

• What I loved:
  • Doing his thing. The casual, friendly, buzzword-free, yet-suitably-nerdy delivery combined with show-stopping visuals delivered once again.  Many a CEO aches to have an audience burst into applause for something they’re showing.  Steve Jobs doesn’t have to ask for it.  Putting aside the earthshattering-ness of his products for a moment, Jobs tees up his great “unveiling” moments with such precision, and with the perfect supporting visuals delivered at JUST the right moment, the audience can’t help but burst into gregarious applause.
  • Take a load off. I loved that he sat down in his chair for the demo.  This was probably necessary just given the nature of the device, but in that moment I finally understood why I would use the iPad.  Sitting on the couch, I would grab it to check something online.  Same goes for when he said, “If I want to buy movie tickets, I grab the iPad in the kitchen, and go to Fandango.”  He painted a picture  that looked eerily like my own kitchen, tapping into my own frustration of needing to just “hop online”… knowing how hideously slow my Blackberry’s browser performance is, and that my computer takes forever to fire up again (because I am STILL on a PC. Long story).
  • Killing them softly. Loved the reference to Amazon’s eReader with the statement (paraphrasing here), “Amazon has done a great job with the Kindle… we are standing on their shoulders and going further.” It left me with a pleasant “isn’t that nice!” feeling, even as Jobs was driving Excalibur right into the fleshy heart of the Kindle.
  • Pricing. When I first heard the $499 pricing, it seemed too expensive. I know, I know, I’m cheap like that. But when he couched it in the statement, “the pundits are saying it will cost $999” (again, paraphrasing), and then delivered the $499 pricing (complete with glass shattering sound and visuals), I immediately changed my tune, and thought, “It wouldn’t be that bad to camp out in front of the Apple store, would it?”
  • Getting stronger. He was also decidedly more cheerful this go around.  There was a much different energy on stage.  You can tell that Steve Job simply feels better, stronger since the Nano unveiling in September.

• What I would have liked to see more/less of:
  • It’s hard to criticize Jobs’ delivery.  Many people tease him for the “amazing”s, the “phenomenal”s, but I still like them.  It’s how we talk, and I appreciate that he speaks like a human being.  But if pushed to choose something, I would say this: I could have done with one less website demo, and instead, I would have liked to have seen a demo of what it’s like to present in Keynote, or how a Word or Excel document feels on an iPad. I know this device isn’t meant to replace a laptop, but man… if I could take an iPad with me through the security line at an airport, and leave my laptop at home… that would make my heart feel SUPER HAPPY! (for those of you with young children, you will note the Kai Lan reference;).

At the end of the day, when you have products as visually arresting, and as fantastic as Apple’s, the script practically writes itself. But once again, Steve Jobs shows us his mastery of simplicity, restraint, and his keen understanding of what we all want to know, see and feel.